Co-parenting with Chaos

Co-parenting is never easy. But co-parenting with a neurodivergent child… that’s a whole different story.

Since the separation, I’ve had to raise my son in two worlds: mine filled with routine, care, and the recommendations of professionals… and the other where consistency is optional, structure is ignored, and everything I worked so hard to build gets undone in 48 hours.

Every time he comes home, it feels like starting over. Again and again. A perpetual reset.
It breaks me. And still, I rebuild.

My advice? Don’t waste your breath trying to convince someone who isn’t ready. If the other parent hasn’t reached a certain level of maturity, your words will echo into silence. You’re not fighting logic, you’re fighting ego.

And yes, it’s the child who suffers.
But your peace, your sanity, is sacred.

Stay focused.
Because even when you feel alone in this, your effort is not in vain.

You start to see progress. You find yourself slowly entering your child’s world, understanding the beauty and complexity of how they see and feel things. That kind of connection… it’s earned. It’s sacred.

And then the other parent, sitting in front of the professionals, will take credit for everything you’ve worked so hard to build.

Let them.

Stay silent.
Because you know the truth and that truth is your power.

Here’s what’s helped me:

• Meditation. Even 5 minutes a day can shift the way you carry stress.
• Choosing your battles. Some hills just aren’t worth dying on.
• Letting go of control. You can’t parent both homes.
• Reminding myself why I’m doing this and who I’m doing it for.

This isn’t about being the “better parent.”
This is about being the parent your child can depend on.

Even when everything else is chaos.